IS MARRIAGE OVERRATED?

Every little girl looks forward to the day she  will be joined with her prince charming in front  of friends, family and even foes. In fact, society has imbided a culture where girls are told that  they will not  be fulfilled in life if they didn't get married. You know what's worse? There's an age limit!!!!! Yes, society has set a time frame within which a girl must be married.

So you've completed your tertiary education, probably done your NYSC( in the case of Nigerians) and gotten a job. Naturally according to tradition, the next step is to get hitched, Right? Maybe you're in your early 20's , maybe your late 20's or even early  30's, ultimately, you feel  the need to get married. Your parents have started asking "those questions", all your friends are getting married, and it seems like you're the only single person on the surface of the earth. Is getting married your latest mission? Be honest........

I'll be writing this post  based on my experience in Nigeria having lived here for the most part of my life. A day doesn't go by without the issue of marriage being raised. Everyone is talking about marriage, either for it, or against it, bottom line is that it's often the topic of discussion particularly amongst women, both married and single. Common phrases include "Oh my God!,She just got engaged!" , "Wow! She's getting married," "Why are you still single?" "and of course, the most frequently asked and dreaded question, (rolling drums..........) , "WHEN ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED?" I've watched friends, family and colleagues stay in unhealthy relationships in order to blend with the trend  of getting married.

When you're in your early 20's, you  are referred to as "fresh blood". You are at the top of your game, trying to get all the male attention. There is so much pressure to look your best which equates to buying expensive human hair either ( Brazilian, Malaysian, or even Hungarian hair). You do everything to get male attention, which includes attending all the weddings  in town(whether you know the couple or not, popularly known as "mo gbo mo branch". Yes, this has happened to the best of us.

Then BOOM! like a speedball, you hit your late twenties! Everyone starts to whisper about your single status, at your place of work, at home, on the street, and even at your place of worship, Yes, i said it, THE CHURCH.  They say things like " Do you know she is still single"' "I  wonder why she hasn't still found a man" , " Can you believe she's still single, yet she is feeling picky"  and " No wonder she is still single". At this point, you get really desperate, lower your standards, and start begging friends and families to set you up with a decent man.

Then, you hit the BIG "30". You feel hopeless. All the good men have been taken, according to society, so you pitch your tent with someone else's husband or you tolerate the loser who doesn't deserve you. You become a sorry case amongst friends and families. You hide at home, not confident enough to crash every wedding in town like you used to. Friends and family carry your burden by setting you up on blind dates without your  consent. Aunties are inviting you to one crusade or another, where the man of God will be releasing the special anointing for marital breakthrough.  Some of you who can't manage the situation, jump at the next available offer, without getting to know the person proposing, a whirlwind romance which often leads to danger.

So I ask, what are your thoughts on marriage? Is marriage overrated? Please drop a line...........